The Swag of Scott (Baio)

Scott Baio is only known for two things: his role as the titular character on two crappy sitcoms, and his role as a player Frank Sinatra wouldn't have left his girlfriend alone with. Now, after falling off the face of the planet for years, Baio has mounted a comeback with a reality show mocking his Hollywood pimp image. I haven't seen the show, but I recognize the brilliance of the concept. Apparently, he just goes around dropping in on old girlfriends, apologizing for being a sleazeball and asking them what went wrong. Hilarity surely ensues.

Baio is the very definition of overachiever. Now, I am neither condemning nor condoning having meaningless "relationships" with an unhealthy amount of partners. But if that's how you choose to live your life, you could do worse than Pamela Lee, Nicole Eggert, Denise Richards, Natalie Raitano (criminally underrated), Nicollete Sheridan and Heather Locklear. He even hooked with Liza Minnelli, which I would liken to choosing Julius Erving for your pick-up basketball team. He may be 60, but he's still Dr. J! Amazingly, Baio got with these A-list celebrities with nothing on his resume but a slew of made-for-TV movies and roles as a babysitter and The Fonz's cousin (apparently, Fonzie put him up on game). Kevin Federline should have a shrine dedicated to the man in his house.

Baio is the subject of more urban legends than Keyzer Soze. The thing is, there are so many great true stories about him that I would have a hard time disbelieving anything I heard. In a recent interview with Howard Stern (Howard, that class act, asked Baio if he could sniff his fingers), Baio was asked to tell "the Playboy story". Turns out, during the late '80s, Baio was the first man to be banned from the Playboy Mansion for making Hugh Hefner jealous. Read that sentence again. If I got cockblocked by HUGH FREAKING HEFNER, my ego would get so big that my head would swell up like Joseph Merrick.

The legend of Scott Baio has grown; that much is evident with a google search. He's something like a cult figure now, and it makes sense. To call him an underdog would be misleading, but it's hard to believe that the one man Hugh Hefner was scared to even let near his girlfriend(s) was the guy who played the nanny on "Charles in Charge". It's like how every year during March Madness, some tiny school pulls off an upset victory, and everyone starts rooting for them. In other words, Scott Baio is the people's champion. The word "swag" gets thrown around an awful lot these days, but...