Turn on the radio to any given station at any given time and there's a good chance the first thing you'll hear is T-Pain "singing". If you want a hit record nowadays, it's who you go see. I say "it" because you can tell from the sound of its voice that T-Pain is obviously some sort of robot. Maybe it's a man who "speaks" electronically like Stephen Hawking. But whatever it is, it's pissing me off.
Kanye West featuring T-Pain. R. Kelly featuring T-Pain. Chris Brown featuring T-Pain. Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band featuring T-Pain. The airwaves are a sea of neverending nasal, autotuned vocals, all performed by one "man". I can't even explain T-Pain's popularity. Ever since it came out with that awful "In Love With a Stripper" song two years ago, I've hated that little cyborg. (I had a funny little story to go along with this, but then I realized I don't really want it in print. Use your imagination.) Regrettably, this would not be my last experience with T-Pain.
Now, T-Pain (it even has a name, Faheem Najm, which doesn't explain where the "T" comes from) rules the radio, and thinking about why could make your head spin. It sounds like Akon trying to sing with his head underwater, which actually might be why people enjoy its music. It's like Ricky Martin and Enrique Eglasias; they both suck, but one of them made something catchy enough to become popular, and the other person just copied them and achieved the same result. At least Akon's "Don't Matter" song was kinda cool, and "Soul Survivor" with Young Jeezy will be looked upon by future generations as a masterpiece. By comparison, T-Pain crafts songs like that inescapable "SHE MOVE HER BODY LIKE A CYYYYYCLOOOONNNEEE!" bullshit, songs that make me want to stab myself in the ear with a corkscrew.
Fun fact: According to Wikipedia, T-Pain's children's names are Lyriq and Muziq.
5 comments:
"T-Pain is obviously some sort of robot. Maybe it's a man who "speaks" through a computer like Stephen Hawking. But whatever it is, it's pissing me off."
I've never even heard or heard of T-Pain, but this blog cracks me up.
Nicely done.
-Alex
p.s. sorry for the weird username, it's a blog for another class and it's the only account I have.
Ok listen here people! I am T-pain's biggest fan and all of you can stop hatin. He CAN sing without the autotone and if he wants to then that is his buisness. Suck it up and go find somethin else to right about bitches! Cuz some people like him. And if you never heard of him then you don't know what music is. You people are honestly dumb and don't understand anything that has to do with music. And is obviousy NOT a robot but can create something you people can't cuz every last one of you who is a hater is a lazy bum that likes to talk shit about peole that are successful!!!!!
Whoever wrote this article is a loser compu nerd. If you actually knew something about T-pain then you would know that the radio doesn't play all of his songs and there are many. IF you want to talk shit about t-pain then do it somewhere else cuz if I saw you I would knock the fuck out of you. Go check out his other songs before you start judging and "Time Machine" is a personal favorite. So go do your research BITCH! And please stab yourself with a corkscrew in you ear cuz you aren't even good enough to listen to T-pain's song. If you post a comment back ITS ON and FUCK YOU BITCH!!!!
WOW WHOEVER WROTE THIS IS A LOSER.... T-PAIN IS A MUSICAL GENIUS..... UR OBVIOUSLY A NON LISENER OF HYS MUSIQ...... PERSONAL FAVES "TIME MACHINE","THERAPY", " CALM DA FUKK DOWN", AND "FREEZE".....
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